I was sitting at McDonald's today pirating Internet. Good pastime that…I jump in the ss minnow and head over to the local swill dealer and don my eye patch, just for free Internet. What one will do to get free stuff!
So I’m sitting mindlessly reading other blogger’s work when I heard a strangely familiar noise. Now if I was a better writer I would be able to write the sounds for you, but I’m not so I won’t. Within a short space of time I realized the two boneheads across from me were doing whippets!
Ok, for those not familiar with whippets I’ll explain. A whippet is nitrous oxide in a little canister normally used for whip cream. Using a device called a “cracker” a canister is cracked open and the nitrous (otherwise known as hippy crack) is expelled into a balloon; known to the discerning whippet aficionados as….as….a…ah...balloon, yeah a balloon man.
I was less annoyed that those two boneheads were sucking down whippets in the middle of a busy McDonald's like they were going out of style, than by the fact that the fucking cracking is loud and annoying. Is that wrong?
So after that for some reason my mind turned to something more morbid. What would you do if you knew you were going to die? And when I say “Knew” I mean you have like a month, or six left and you had no question that it would happen. Think about it, and then put that thought on the shelf for a few minutes. Walk away, look from another direction, than pick it back up and think about it again. Is it still the same?
This train of thought will be the basis for my next post, a short story about someone who has just got the news
The phone rings.
“Hello” a voice from the end of miles of wire says.
“Mike is that you?” the woman says with a hint of concern “Mike?”
Hushed wracking sobs could be heard from the phone.
“Mike what is wrong?” the hint has turned into a hurricane “your scaring me. Mike just say something!”
“Mom, Mom I’m dying…..
Chris McQueeney 11/28/11 11:23 PM