Blah Blah Blah

I'm not here right now, leave your name and number after the beep.......

Monday, June 30, 2014

Here's to a new adventure, cheers!

 


Stark and Dry


Where do you go when your soul
is just not right
When from horizon to horizon
It is stark
Why so bleak and dry
When it is dark inside
while within a sandstorm 
I hide
Where do you go when it's time to hide
When it is dark
And storming inside your mind
Where do you go
When it is dark and Dreary
Stark and Dry


Chris McQueeney    6/30/14    10:45 A.M.



So I am pondering the layout of My Chapbooks and I just realized that I can do anything I want as far as the content goes. They will be my books, mine...that is kind of a heady feeling. Not only that it is in a way daunting. I want them to be well received. Even though you could technically call me an artist and a poet it is still new to me. In a lot of ways I think very linear, straight lines and all. Kinda goes with me being a Libra, balance and fairness...well, here's to a new adventure, cheers!    

Sunday, June 29, 2014

Stalking Myself








Was made


Shadowed soul seeking a hole
To bury itself
One bottle of gin
Then let us begin
that beastly role
A grave digger's spade
Was perfectly made to lead the way
Inside of dirt's womb
Deeply entomb
The mess we have made
Glass in hand
Roughly engraved
A soul's last stand
Was made


Chris McQueeney   6/29/14    4:37 P.M.


I am working on a new book, this one will take  a while for me to put together...I'm guessing Stalking Myself will be in the editing stage by early next year...in the mean time I will be putting out two Chapbook editions of my poetry with annotations and short musings of mine.

Monday, June 23, 2014

The Memory Tree



        Comforting


Shaking the memory tree
At times can be
Comforting
Danger
     The sign ahead
                   Says to me
                                Caution
              Falling memory
Gotta be a bit careful
When shaking the memory tree
What comes loose
May not seem
So comforting


Chris McQueeney

Saturday, June 21, 2014

American Dream



American Team


Tornado alley trailer park
Speakeasy
Sleezy speed freak
Wheezing his way
On the wrong side
Of the tracks
Sit back
And watch it wind
Its cyclonic
Disaster
Trashing its way
Through our everyday
Got no scratch
Got no play
Way of life
Lived to the utmost 
Tornado alley trailer park
Dream
Speaksleezy queen
Cream of the crop
Rises up to meet
Him
On top of the heap
Modern day
American team


Chris McQueeney  6\20\14   1:02 P.M.

Thursday, June 19, 2014

once on a lul-a-by





There is Only Sky


Somewhere over the rainbow
there is only sky
no witches on broomsticks
or monkeys that can fly
Somewhere over the rainbow
are dreams that lie
no twister falling houses
or little people on the line
somewhere over the rainbow
there is only sky
no dreams to be spoken of
once on a lul-a-by


Chris McQueeney    6/19/14   3:59 P.M.

Wednesday, June 18, 2014

Pillars down








Notwithstanding


There's been
A communication breakdown
Your effusive use of words
Eludes me
Effectively blocking understanding
Their gravity of course
Notwithstanding
Sampson brought the pillars down
Easier than
Bridging the rapidly
Growing chasm 
Verbal canyon
Between you and me
Although knee to knee
Eye to eye we just can't see
How this came to be
I don't know
You got me
All I do know is
You got me!


Chris McQueeney    6/18/14    4:44 P.M.

Tuesday, June 17, 2014

tee off








No Short Game


Where do you
Put the tee
When you putt
The courses 
Of the moon
Do you radio
Fore
When your drive
Travels a mile
Or more
No worries mate
Just dump your shit
Over there
Gentle toss
Is all you'll need
Sorry we brought
Only drivers
There's no short game
On the moon


Chris McQueeney 6\15\14

I wanted to take a moment to express how utterly grateful I am at the state of my life...I get to see my children tomorrow, I am not homeless, or in jail...I'm happily sober and alive


Sunday, June 15, 2014

Happy Fathers Day






Parts of the story


I live where lepers walk
Dropping hints wherever they haunt
Bits and pieces
Putting finger to it's
Not hard, rather simple when
They're just laying around
As if to spare
Parts of the story
Are missing
He says with ire
There's nothing to fear
Child
No worries here


Chris McQueeney 2:11 P.M.


Friday, June 13, 2014

wants and needs







Says stay


People be damned
The heart wants
What the heart wants
Who's to say
What's right
Or wrong
How do you stay strong
If the heart
Says stay
When it's time
To go
People be damned
Who's to say
What's right
Or wrong
The heart wants
What the heart needs
Why fight
It's too strong


Chris McQueeney.  6\13\14.  12:27 P.M.



Wednesday, June 11, 2014

today I will take what I can get






PO ET RY

Am I to literal
in my po et ry
Am I to literal
I don't know
I am Me

Chris McQueeney


Just a quick check in today...not much time infront of the computer...but oh well, I will take what I can get.



Monday, June 9, 2014

You Say



Don't speak


Just a random
Tuesday
They're watching me
You say
Looking over your shoulder
Without moving
Your head
See what I mean
You say
They listen don't speak
You say
Looking over your sholder
Without turning your head
Just a random Tuesday
Trust that
You say
I listen back
Just don't speak
They think
It's just another
Random Tuesday


Christopher McQueeney.  6\8\14

This was penned in responce to a piece from Christopher at northernwall.blogspot.com his piece is named survellance (excuse my spelling please)


Sunday, June 8, 2014

Quillective










Rings the Sound



Sunlight danced across the sky
The days  you were born 
Gentle my hand upon her thigh
My other hand brushed
Hair from her eyes
Breathe hunny
Just breathe
I said as I held my breath
While in my head raced
Things unsaid
Hand laid gentle upon her brow
I told her I loved her
And reminded her how
To breathe hunny
Just breathe
These years later I'm reminded
How
Both of you came
With those memories
Rings the sound
Breathe hunny
Just breathe
Sunlight danced across the sky
The days you came to my life
My children, to you both these words
I love you


Chris McQueeney    5/28/14    3:05 P.M.




I dedicate this to my Children Chase and Karley...this was also written in response to the Quillective project Sorry for being late maybe next one right....Amber Rockin Red Norrgard 

Friday, June 6, 2014

Brutally



Unspoken


I live in a world
Where nothing's
Quite real
And I feel just
Off center
Off kilter
The filter broken
I don't say...
Can't say
Not quite real
We must
Leave these things
Unspoken

Christopher McQueeney.  2:03 pm. 6\4\14


After my injury I pulled in all my feelers. I thought I needed to protect myself. Sitting on the shitter today it dawned on me that I needed to get back to the writing that drove me before the hurt and fear and obsessive need to be safe. I am an alcoholic, I grew up poor and beset by dammaging experances, was driven by a disease. Immature I lived isolated even when surrounded by other people...when I learned to write i was freed in a way from that sad existance. I write raw and from the hip unafraid of the impression you may have, or rather I did, but in my need to protect myself, my children, and my little world I wrote from fear. At times the real writer would come out and I would brutally apraise myself, but inevatably the fear would return. I am an alcoholic without alcohol, have suffered a tramatic brain injury, and have survived. I plan to write about the last two years but I am going to give it some healing time; I want my writing raw, not me.

Monday, June 2, 2014

tail chacer


Being found


Fear of never and ever being found
wanting
waiting for the day that
they will say
your not enough
not enough
to grow through
not enough
to live through
not enough
to stay the line
true to what you should and
shouldnt do
live in a fear of never and ever
being found


Chris McQueeney    8/26/14    10:07 A.M.

Have you ever seen a dog or cat chasing their tail? it is funny to watch...but it is not fun to do. At times I feel like I get stuckin a very circular thinking pattern. Might have something to do with my TBI but it is hard to tell. I try to talk with people in my life about the things that happen as the result of the TBI and they often say in a most infuriating way "that happnes to me too", as if they have the need to minimize the reality of the changes in my life. No, you don't have it happin to you too I want to shout at times. I was forgetful prior to my injury, that's not the same as having short term memory loss as the result of a brain trauma. I remember things before, and it is different now. I am not bemoaning the lot that life has handed me rather I am venting a frustrating facit of my life. Things have improved dramatically and I am greatful for an amazing ammount of support I have recieved from friends and family. The worst thing someone can say to a sufferer of A TBI or any other mental health crises is  ""but you look just fine". Maybe try saying something like "I have noidea the struggles you are experancing, but I am here for you.

Breathe Again



Photo: Sucuess


Breathe Again


Living  with my insides
On the outside
Is uncomfortable to say the least
Can you see the flow
Artery path the the brain
Can you see the pain
From the ends of my fingers 
To the tips of my toes
Can you see the joy
All that from
One girl and one boy
Living with my outsides on the inside
Was necessary to say the least
That was what I heard
When I got the word
You can see them again...can 
Breathe again, inside-out or not
Breathe again


Christopher  McQueeney



After nine months I finally got the chance to hold my children again. This living nightmare has ended, it was amazing. They had grown so much...I guess that is what happens in nine months. I get to see them again thursday....and I plan to spend as much time with them as humanly possible....say hello to Chase Douglas McQueeney and Karley Marie McQueeney