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Tuesday, November 13, 2012

Upon the land

Upon the land

Slip the world of its bounds
This mortal coil unwound
Where were you
The night the stars fell
From sky so full
Oh I can still hear
Still hear the sound
Screams so loud
The stars are so beautiful
When they stay their place
They are not so beautiful
Upon the land
Slip the world of its bounds
This mortal coil unwound
I still remember
Can never forget
The night the stars fell

Chris McQueeney    11/11/12    8:04 P.M.

This is being linked to dVerse poetry pub


Anonymous said...

Very haunting image coupled with haunting visions carried on haunting words.

Brian Miller said...

dang man...brutal imagery...end of times....wha a scary moment that would be...not only if they fell to the earth...but to realise one night they were gone...and we so alone...

Mary said...

This is truly beautiful....but yes, I certainly would rememberas well the night that 'the stars fell.' Mystery here...

ayala said...

A powerful and good write !

hedgewitch said...

Striking imagery--and a feeling of personal loss carried outward.

Sabio Lantz said...

Your drawing/painting ?? (not credited)
That looks like a donkey that fell ! Ouch.
Made me think of Mortal Combat. :-)

But on a serious note: the common poetry phrase of "mortal coil" made me look it up. Shakespeare used it, of course, but I was fascinated to learn its Greek Myth origin:

'In this way, the length of our life is metaphorically the length of thread that is coiled on a spool, a metaphor related to the ancient Greek mythological figures of the Fates. As we live, the thread is unwound from the coil by the shuttle of the loom of time." (from Wiki}

Thought I'd share in case there are other folks like me who didn't know.

BerlinerinPoet said...

Working on your End of the World poetry? haha! Kidding. I really think this is so beautiful!

Claudia said...

scary images in this...the falling stars..when things develop in a way they shouldn't ...leaves us often helpless

She Writes said...

Though I have not heard your voice, I think you should do what Erin ( sometimes does, read this aloud at your blog.

I read it out loud and it has a really nice rhythm. It holds a melancholy feel. A little Poe-ish.

Jessica Lynn Lang said...

This is a good poem. I like the repeating lines--it gives the piece a song like quality. The rhymes nice, and the story is intense.