PDA

With me


PDA
Public Displays of Affection
P retty
D amned
A nnoying
If you ask me
Why the hell
Are you inflicting me
With your puppy dog love
Forcing everyone to consider
Why you are so happy
While they feel
So crappy
Most of the time
I understand a kiss is nice
But let me give you
Some advice
It is even better
In private
See
In private
It doesn't matter
Where I sit
I will never be able to see
You will no longer
Inflict on me
How she goes all
Week in the knees
Or how tightly
You squeeze
Her to stay on her feet
How swept away
One woman could be
I try to imagine it was me
Clutched so tightly
She pressed so tightly
And me
Sitting here alone
Now so lonely
And me
So so angrily
Viewing
Your
P
D
A
Silently simmering
Jealously glimpsing
Her with you
And not
With me


Chris McQueeney ©2015


Linked to The Mag

If Wishes Were Wings

Soooo, it has been a while since my last post. I have been working on my very first book! And, for that matter I have also been working on book 2 as well...
My first book, If Wishes Were Wings, will consist of 100 pieces written in free verse; hopefully to be available for sale by March 2016.
Hope all is well in your worlds!

Stick figure Man

Technicolor memories


The stick figure man
Went gun in hand
To the room to be by himself
At times that room
Was like his mama's womb
Today it was to be
Something else indeed
Simply put
Today it was to be
His tomb
The feel of steel
In his hand
Like the sands in an hourglass
Enevatable
When need outweighs will
Everything else is of no consequence
Time stands still
Intent reigns
Instant gratification
Holds nothing
In light of suicide
Idolized cemetry
When need outweighs will
Blanking the slate
Of a rancid landfill brimming
Overwhelming
This last semblance of humanity
With nothing left but need
His will indeed becoming complete
At last released
In his toomb
His life painted
On the walls
For all to see
Technicolor memories
All that is left of me


Chris McQueeney 2015

Sunday Offering

Even though



There we were
With the world at our feet
Dreams at our fingertips
Standing so close
Yet so far away
Wouldn’t dream of being
Anywhere else but with you
Today
Every day after
Measured and weighed
Bar set so high
I’ll say
The world dimmed today
Standing so close
Yet so far away
And I knew
That
If you knew
Your face would change
And you would step away
So close I’ll hold
This memory tight
How close you stood
To me today
Your touch
Just a fingertip away
As I rest my weary head tonight
This memory of you
I’ll hold so close inside
So close we stood today
Even though you are so far away


Chris McQueeney ©2015


This is being linked to The Mag for Tess's Sunday prompt...

Flower filked sky

The remains


Where do our
Fallen Foes
Or Heroes
Go
Do they fly into
The sky
On chariots of light
To fight again
For redemption
And rebirth
Or
Is it worse
Do they stay
And fight
Day after day
Never to lay down
To rest
Back to a wall
Head on knees
The rise and fall of
Their chests
Leading one to believe
This is real
Leading one to believe
There might be some release
Where do our
Fallen Foes
Or Heroes
Go
Heaven
Or Hell
Who is to tell
Dead is dead
All we see are
The remains
Of shattered dreams


Chris McQueeney ©2015

This was penned in response to the prompt at The Mag

Weird Shit

People of Wal-Mart

They wear the weirdest
Shit
No thought no grace
They get away with it
Absolutely no shame on their faces
And they do weird things
Like argue
And bring their families
They sing
In the music department
Watch Montel on the flat screen
In home electronics
They will wait in line for days
Only to save a few dollars
On a blender or mixer
Brand-new living-room fixture
Living their lives
On layaway
Grazing their days away in produce
Wandering the isles
Like an Alzheimer's mile
Rabbit food is on isle 4
Next to the piller
Close to the floor


Chris McQueeney ©2015


This is penned in respose to image above credit for image at The Mag Here

The scent

Nothing more


You lay there
With that look upon
Your face
And I left
With a lingering
Taste
On my lips
And the sent
Of sex in the air
Like a cat
Feline stretch
Content
Not I though
For me was but a taste
I'm a wreck
A waste
And I left
Needing more
And more
And more
Please Now I have need
Nothing more


Chris McQueeney ©2015


The Mag

just another night

Dry spells


So I walk outside
Take a look at the night sky
And realize that there
Is so much more
To life
Than meets the eye
Spend so much time
Worrying about
This or than
Rarely stopping to breathe
It all in
But
On those rare occasions
When the magnitude
Of all that Is
Or is not
A part of my life
Sinks in
I try if only
For a moment
To hold it tangible
Store it deep inside
To tide me over
During life's dry spells


Chris McQueeney. ©2015

Magpie Tales

Jackson Pollock, Black Flowing, No. 8


Dissonance


Trying to make sense
Of all the dissonance
Is maddening
To say the least
You reached into me
Pulling
Tearing
Leaving me bleeding
Gleefully you tore at me
Then danced around flinging me
About with wild abandon
There I was wounded deep
You looked back at me
As if half asleep
Slow wicked grin
As you walked away
Leaving me again
And again
And again
Leaving me to pick up
All of my pieces
Again
And again
Leaving me to make sense
Of this madness
Again


Chris McQueeney ©2015


Penned in responce to a prompt from Tess over at The Mag

Narcissus are you there?

If Narcissus were a man
Standing in front of a mirror
Conical shell in hand
Piercing blue eyed stare
Cloths just so
Perfectly quaffed hair
In his mind it is all there
Except for one thing
If only the shell
With the sound of the sea
Would tell the story
Of him
As well
As any reflection
That fell from his presence alone
If only
The shell would sing
A song of me
Narcissus I need you
Are you there


Chris McQueeney ©2015


Posted on The Mag http://magpietales.blogspot.com/2015/10/mag-289.html?showComment=1444950827505&m=1#c4448580081975661831

Francis “Marie” McQueeney 10/28/26 to 9/17/2015. Marie was a loving mother, grandmother, great grandmother, partner, and friend. A lifetime Christian Marie was a member of the First Christian Church of Portland and held many service positions in the church. Marie had a long and wonderful career With MGM Marketing. Marie also loved to travel, over much of the globe, often with friends and family. Her celebration of life will be held on 10/4/15 at 1:00 PM First Christian Church of Portland 1314 SW Park Ave Portland Or 97201. Please visit http://www.anewtradition.com/obituaries/obituary/11996 for a more detailed remembrance.  

Francis Marie McQueeny

10/28/1926 to 9/17/2015

Born Francis Marie Ritchey on October 28^th 1926 at the family homestead in Free-water Or. A graduate of Union High School in Milton-Free-water Oregon. Marie then moved on to graduate from Butler University, Indianapolis Indiana, earning a Baccalaureate of arts in 1948. Marie then married Carl Ray McQueeney. A home maker for twelve years she then transitioned for the next thirty seven years to Office Manager then Corporate Secretary/Treasurer as well as a member of the Board of Directors of MGM Marketing After retiring from MGM Marie worked for a short time as a personal assistant to Rudie Wilhelm Jr.As a lifelong Christian and longtime member Of the First Christian Church, Disciples of Christ, downtown Portland Or, Marie served as Chairman of the Elders of the Church, on the CAP and Finance Committees, the Board, the Nominating Committee, as well as Program Chairman and President of Christian Woman’s & Men’s Fellowship. Marie was also a member of the Evergreen Club since 1953. Marie loved to travel and was an amazing travel companion going all over the planet at times with family, with friends, or on her own. Marie was always well versed in the places she chose to visit and loved to share her adventures. Marie loved to play bridge with the ladies, was an avid reader, music lover regularly attending concerts at Bradfords on Sunday evenings, enjoyed her computer and sharing her life online through Facebook…She especially wanted it known that most of all she loved spending her time with her friends and family!

Marie was preceded by her husband Carl in 1988, and her son Scott Douglas McQueeney April 26^th 2003. Marie is survived by her life Her life partner: Clarence “Red” Newman, daughter and son in-law: Nancy and Allan Schuff; son: Steven Mcqueeney; grandchildren: Jennifer Marie McQueeney, Christopher Mcqueeney, April Marie Leonard, Shannon Marie McQueeney, Tyler Tappenbeck; great grandchildren: Joshua White, Jasmin Marie White, Riley White, Chase McQueeney, Karley Marie McQueeny, Mckayla Klehler, Emmett Leonard, and Owen Leonard…

Celebration of life to be held at First Christian Church of Portland 1314 SW Park Ave Portland Or 97201 Sunday October 4^th 2015 at 1:00 P.M. Social gathering to follow directly after service.

Remembrances to:

First Christian Church of Portland 1314 SW Park Ave Portland Or 97201

Or to: Community solutions

https://www.paypal.com/us/cgibin/webscr?cmd=_flow&SESSION=_FetDAh288e8MjGbRgt_aE2XeaY_AdXcnBzBUS5kR_4SWW9WrukxIO_JHSW&dispatch=5885d80a13c0db1f8e263663d3faee8d0b9dcb01a9b6dc564e45f62871326a5e

Thank you for being a part of Marie’s life

Insufficient

They asked me to tell 
A story of you
With words
But I find words
Insufficient
How do you describe 
A sunrise
To someone without eyes
My dilemma is
You were so much more
To me
Than words can say
I can tell of how we sat
Amongst artists in Paris
But they will never know
Your smile
They can look at pictures
Of you
On the great wall
But how can a picture
Bring tingles to one
As you did win you sang
Songs from that amazing
Mind of yours
How can stories of your
Dinner dates with Joe McCarthy
Bring to them
The safety inherent
In being in your arms
How can I
With mere words
Describe an angel such as you
I just can't suffice
But I had to try
With a tear in my soul
And tears in my eye
I will simply say 
I love you
Good bye

In loving memory of Francis Marie McQueeney

Chris McQueeney 2015

The Mag 285

American dream


In the detritus
Of a life left behind
I find dioramas
In my mind
Second grade snapshots
Of the american dream
The Waltons had one
In theirs the Cleavers had fun
Dreams of cinematic
Days gone bye
Of a bygone era
The baby boomers
All had rooms
Or
Yards to play in
In the attic of the home
That is no longer ours
I come by this memory
Of yours
And all my scars
Stand at attention
Each one just the same
A memory of
Days gone by
Bygone relics of the
American dream


Chris McQueeney ©2015


This post inspired by the image prompt from Tess at The Mag.  

Gated community...

On the other side


There we were
At the gate
To the middle
Of nowhere
And I felt
At home
On the other side
Everything opened up wide
There we were
A couple boards
Between you and me
And eternity
There was no latch
So I kicked that fucker down


Chris McQueeney ©2015

Image prompt the Mag

http://magpietales.blogspot.com/2015/09/mag-284.html?m=1

By a mile

Day by day


I have good days
and there are the bad ones
on the good days
I sing to my children
and they sing back
on the bad days I scream
inside my own head and
still I sing to my children
because that is what
you   do
you keep on
keeping on
I have good days
and
I have bad ones
the bad ones outweigh
the good by a mile
but what do you do
you keep on keeping on


Chris McQueeney 2015

poem comp #2

A compilation of poems I posted on FaceBook.. 

Sunday best

Put your money where
Your mouth is
Show me what you really mean
Because
In the end
Words
Are only words
I'm sure you know
How good you are
How just
But it's not quite so clear
To the rest of us
It is easy
To say
I am a just man
Or
I am just a man
When you have your hand
In the pocket
Of the least of your fellows
It is easy
From a life of ease
To live how you please
That's ok though
If once a week
Amongst your fellows
You wear your
Sunday best

Chris McQueeney ©2015

The way of things

Carry on my friend
You have yet
Much to give
That old sitting tree
Is gone now
And your presence is missed
That curb you sat on
Most days still lingers
Many there remember you fondly
Even quoting you upon occasion
But that is a flimsy substitute
For the real you
There is much I would discuss
With you
Quarks and gravity time
Sobriety
And the way of things
But to burden you
I do not want
Me with my frantic pace
In life
And you with your
Quiet revere

Chris McQueeney ©2015

I am hypocrisy

Sit tall with your hypocrisy
Bring it out
And show it to me
Wear that shit like a badge
Whip it out
To quiet the crowd
Keep them in their place
Acknowledge your inconsistencies
With absolutely no intention
Of changing
For, you are but a human
And humans consistently
Fall short
Absolving you of any
Responsibility
Say with true sincerity
I am hypocrisy
It is part of me
Know this and you too
Will see
Don't
Do as I do
Leave that up to me
It is what I say
That you need to be
Follow me
For I am hypocrisy

Chris McQueeney ©2015

Smile bright

Sometimes I find
That a well meaning
Fuck Off
Is in kind
With a
Thank you
Two examples
Of just two words
That when said
With meaning
Are always bringing
A bright smile
To me
wink emoticon

Chris McQueeney ©2015

Hungry eyes

And the marionette dances
To the haunted glances
Of hungry eyes
Living hand to mouth
Week in the knees
Hands shake
Watch the strings quake
The doll stumble steps
As if in a trance
No chance of the watchers
Looking away
Even though they are hungry today
The whirling jerk of its dance
Is their only chance
Of blotting out the pain
Of an empty belly again

Chris McQueeney ©2015

In the wash

I have fear
In my life today
What if what I need
I just can't be
What if my measures
All fall short
Would that I could
Go back
To the day
That my life was
Ripped away
What if I took two
Steps to the left
Or simply stood in place
Averting
Everything
All the trauma
And pain
Going away without
Even finding me
What If I fall short
And the bar is just too high
I am tired of picking
Gravel from my wounded
Hands and knees
But I have to try
Finding my failings by braille
Life's not over when you fail
Even though I know
Everything will
come out in the wash
I am afraid all the same

Chris McQueeney ©2015

Suspect

Guttering your way through life
Whisper thin and screaming
There you are a banshee 
Bringing It all back to me
Squint against the streaming
Starlight rays reflect
Shattering your intellect
Ideas In your brain careening
Rendering your thought
process suspect
Just try to weather
The storm
Nothing new here
Just the new norm
Brain fried
Hands tied behind
Your back
It's nothing to me
This lack of perspective
Lets keep calm here
We already know
Your thoughts are suspect
And as such
Are held with no respect

Chris McQueeney ©2015

Have nothings

Pull up a stretch of cement
And rest your weary head
Its been a long day
Trying to make way
In this game called life
The divide between
The haves
And the have not's
Is a stark reality
What is even more grim
Are the have nothings
No where to go
Nothing to do
There are channels
On the streets
That are wide and deep
Once you dive in
It is either sink or swim
And the current is strong
Pull up a stretch of cement
And rest your weary head

Chris McQueeney ©2015

If she only knew

Celluloid traps

As I trace the lines

Of your existence 

Old celluloid traps

Encasing all

That is left of you

If a picture

Is worth a thousand words

A simple memory

Of you

Is priceless

Chris McQueeney ©2015

Image credit:Peonies, William Merritt Chase, 1897 This is being linked to The Mag 283

Poem comp #1

I am posting a series of poems in one post because I have them posted on FaceBook already but want them here for safe keeping

County bound

Washington county bound
And destined to fail
Once you are behind their bars
Inside their jail
All hail the mighty beast
The need to punish
Grind down the will to resist
Sacrifice the will to live
Become less than human
To survive just one more day
The hardened say
Time ain't shit
But when you look in
Their eyes
And at their manic grins
Puts paid to their state
Of mind
If you look hard enough
You will find
All the grooves
From the machinery
Cement and steel
Everything hard
The only feel to have is pain
Freedom only a specter to fear
The odds are you will find
Yourself on your way back here
Washington County bound
And destined to fail

Chris McQueeney ©2015

Of me

And I kick the tangles
Of my life
As if to expose
Those moments that defined
Me
And placed me in
Time
Had I been serious in my intent
I would step to the side
So as to find
The start of things
Then pick it up
To bring
It closer for inspection
Knit it into a pattern
For all to see
At least that little stretch
Of me

Chris McQueeney ©2015

Inadvertently

What happens
When it just slips through
The cracks
Is the world over
Never coming back
What if the best I have
Just wont pick up the slack
I try so hard
I try I try
But I just can't find
What my fingers missed
What inadvertently I've left behind
I've simplified my life
Because
I can't trust my mind
Still things fall to the wayside
Even though I tried
Yet I push on
And on I find
With help I can "just get by"
And by that I can have a life
What happens when things
Slip through a crack
Its all right
I got people they got my back...

Chris McQueeney ©2015

Chained

They say them vape
Machines be ok
So I donned a blindfold
And puffed away
Apple candy
Raspberry pie
Gave um all a try
I wont lie
I thought it sexy
To puff like a chimney
Expelling great clouds
Then the thought occurred to me
May have no more empty packs
Or a mouth like an ashtray
But to this handheld
Machine I am chained...

Chris McQueeney ©2015

That motherfucker bites

grief is a beast with sharp teeth
And it's got my number
Gets me every time
It's sharpened bite
Latching on
And me already tender
I fail to keep it in
Comes out sideways
Dousing everyone in my vicinity
Vitriol in its purist form
Pain driven rants stain
Making things fucked up again
Grief is a beast with sharp teeth
Comes out of left field
Beats me up and down
Protections hamper it not in the least
Steal myself against its
Not so tender mercies
If you see me
All hunched up
Tears coursing my cheeks
Leave me be
Please don't seek to comfort me
Lest in my pain
I lash out again
And cause in you
Your very own grief

Chris McQueeney ©2015

God bless the USA

I went to watch
The television today
And got reminded why I went away
Reality tv
Entertainment news try to control me
Pound for pound there be no
Louder voice around
But that's OK
Corporate America will have their way
Armed conflicts are good for business
And business is good today
The wheels on the machine
Grind their way
Through our day to day
Life
Our people are dying
For nothing
But that's OK
It's not happening next door
Thousands of miles
Oceans away
Why do all the Republicans
Want you to hate
While the Democrats distract
With social issues
Both are just pundents
Privately funded
From the same coffers
We die in the tens
While they die in the thousands
Who started it anyway
Wasn't them
But that's OK
It's in our national security
At least that's what the politicians
And the newscasters
All say

Chris McQueeney ©2015

The Piggly Wiggly

And the day
Went by
That they didn't care
All's fair in love
And war
But they say
This is no war
Then the side of their neck
Opens up
This is a war on terror
They spout
As if Terror was a tang able thing
Terror is a great motivator
Makes uneducated trailer trash
Quake in their boots
What if them turban heads
Come to Alabama to take our jobs
And rape our women
Cuz you know that
Terrorists come from Mexico
And Muslims don't believe in God
Least that's what Jim at the Piggly Wiggly
Said his preacher told all the good folks
It's a war of terror
And we take no prisoners of war
Oh them?
They be what you call "detainees"

Chris McQueeney ©2015

Yet we see

There be magic in this world
Yet all we see are computers and compromise
Food carts 
And crack heads on the corner
We wear glasses to see clearly
But the lenses are only attuned
To the surface of things
There be magic in this world
You have only to try
To see to the heart of things

Chris McQueeney ©2015

Looked into his eyes

I saw a dream today
A dream of a life gone away
I looked into his eyes
saw my fate
And my past
All it took was one glance
But I kept looking
Just the same
From an outside perspective
It is just a god damn shame
From an outside perspective
Only he and he only was to blame
See, the only thing is
From an inside perspective
We are just the same
It is easy to look at that wreckage
And say we wouldn't do the same
He should just get over it
For shame
It is easy to look from the outside
And think we know who's to blame
If he would only try
All it took was one look into his eyes
For me to know the pain in his soul
For me to know that there is no control
Nothing he can do on his own
No human way to walk back
From the depths of that hell
I looked him in the eye without flinching
Or blaming him for being him
Instead I offered him some compassion
Spent a little gas on
Taking him to a place where he could be safe
To a place where he could get the help he so desperately needs
I saw a dream today
A dream of a life gone away

Chris McQueeney ©2015

The wager

Took a walk today
To see what I could see
Looked at my steps
What I left behind
I set my soul down
Somewhere
I set it down
And I didn't care
Set it down
Back there
Had no idea
Until I stopped to see
What I had left
behind me
Turned around
Step by step
I set out to find
The soul I left behind
The farther I went
The more I could see
The damage I caused
It was all me
I couldn't hide from the fact
Soul or not
I broke my pact with the world
Punishing those around me
Laid the blame at their feet
When all they wanted for me
Was peace
And the freedom to be
Safe and whole
Step by painful step
It became clear to me
I would need some help
So I wagered my soul
And God brought it back to me
Winning a bet never felt so good
My soul is here and I am free

Chris McQueeney ©2015

Keyboard hero

Klicking your way
From day to day
Ever there to say
Here I am
I know the way of things
Never letting control
Go away
The feel of keys
Ease your mind
As you save the day
Everyone needs a hero
Like you
Showing them the way
The Way
You can't help it
If you are gifted
These things just happen
You say to an empty room
Turning off the computer
Is ok for now
You'll be back soon
Good for them
You think
That You were there today
Keyboard Hero

Chris McQueeney ©2015

I fucking hate Walmart

There you are
Sitting in your Ivory tower
Expecting everyone
To bow or
At least pay homage
To the all consuming
Intellectual prowess
You display
In the merest twitch of your little finger
You fucking twat
Just because you read
Hemingway
Doesn't mean you know
The tingle of fear
From crown to toe
Running with the bulls
Creates
To you Pamplona is just
A dot on the map
An artist's rendering
You know revolution through
Les Misérables
Though you have never walked
The Tuileries
You think you know the
Cost of war by watching
Saving Private Ryan
Dolby surround sound
You think you know Germany
Because you ate some
Black Forest ham
You revel in your intimacy
With hunger
Having seen the image
Of a starving child
In Time Magazine
You think you know humor
Because you once Saw Eddy Murphy
On the television
You sir are nothing
Store bought
I can find anything you have to offer
At Walmart
I fucking hate Walmart
But I would rather shop there
Than gain a fucking thing
From you...

Chris McQueeney ©2015

Harmful to consume

Built-in obsolescence
Shelf life measured love
Just another in a long line
Of regularly occurring
Purchases
Expiration date metered
Self involvement
Processed filler like
Emotions
Generated by the shiny
Cellophane wrapper
And the numerals
On the price tag
Artificial ingredients
Harmful to consume
Offering only empty calories...

Chris McQueeney 2015©

There and then

And she says with no pause
A week of days
And a month of nights
Have sailed the heavens
Since last we met
The quiet scratching of pen on paper
Or the manic clicking
Of keys
Chronicling this decent
Sleep deprivation blurring
The lines between
here and now
And
There and then
Making clear this little fact
Only sleep will bring you back
To me
Sanity once again
Maybe
Or maybe not
We'll see

Chris McQueeney 2015

Wheels in a tree

Oh to be a cog in the machine
Just a worker bee
Dotting my I's 
Crossing my T's
No responsibilities
No decisions
Just my place in the machine
Build me up a rut
So deep
It would swallow me
And furnish that motherfucker
Cool calm comfort
Nothing out of place
Oh to be
Just a limb on a tree
Or better yet a ring
In its trunk for me
Years and years
Never bothering
Either a cog in the machine
With a furnished rut
Or a ring in a tree
Maybe then I'll be safe
And you will never find me
Won't get your fingers
In my cracks
Won't tear your way into me
Then again you could
Break your way into the machine
Light a fire under my tree
Guess you'll have me then
No escape
That's the problem with ruts and rings
They make it hard to flee
I still have scars
And wicked dreams
From the last time you caught me...

Chris McQueeney 2015

Its Monday

Wheel in a tree


Oh to be a cog in the machine
Just a worker bee
Dotting my I's
Crossing my T's
No responsibilities
No decisions
Just my place in the machine
Build me up a rut
So deep
It would swallow me
And furnish that motherfucker
Cool calm comfort
Nothing out of place
Oh to be
Just a limb on a tree
Or better yet a ring
In its trunk for me
Years and years
Never bothering
Either a cog in the machine
With a furnished rut
Or a ring in a tree
Maybe then I'll be safe
And you will never find me
Won't get your fingers
In my cracks
Won't tear your way into me
Then again you could
Break your way into the machine
Light a fire under my tree
Guess you'll have me then
No escape
That's the problem with ruts and rings
They make it hard to flee
I still have scars
And wicked dreams
From the last time you caught me...


Chris McQueeney

Stage Left

Reel them in


Put on your mask
And play to the crowd
Reel them in
With your semblance
Of humanity
Awe them
With your honest portrayal
Of a wounded creature
Blatantly psychotic rendition
Of what a life should look like
On the other side of sanity
Peel the mask off during intermission
But don't get too comfortable
All the players are in their positions
Ready for the que
Mark
And go
Careening your way
There you go again
Acting outside of your part
Is that a tear in your eye
No no no
We can't have that now
Get it together
Play your part
Broken with an edge
Got to keep all your corners sharp
Till curtain call
Bow your way off stage left
The stage clears
Audience leaves
Freeing you to flee to another type
Of captivity

Chris McQueeney 

over and over

Free will


Your love broke me
Left me vacant and empty
And you
You
Broke me
Over and over again
And in that breaking
My will you were taking
Over and over again
God gave me free will
And freely
I let you
Take it from me
Over
And over again
Free will ain't so free
There is a price to pay
And I broken again
Foot the bill
Gladly


Chris McQueeney

Broken pieces

All the right places


You are broken
In all the right ways
Fractures and fissures
From one side of your soul
To the other
Taken individually they don't mean much
But when laid end to end
When you put the pieces together
They paint a picture
You sure are pretty
But that ain't all I need
You got all the right pieces
In all the right places
Yeah baby
You sure do do it for me
I want to slide up
Next to you
Pick you up
Hold you together
You are broken
In all the right places
Maybe you'll join me
And we can break together


Chris McQueeney

The Mag

To see


I took one step
Then another
One after the other
To the sun
The days are getting longer
Or is it the nights
It is hard to tell
I get so turned around by life
But to it I go
Even though I don't know
Up from down these days
Maybe one day
It will catch up to me
Until then we will just have to see


Chris McQueeney 

That pain filled moment...

Skin to skin


Don't look me in the eye
Because then I will see
How much this hurts you
And me
I don't know how to handle this
You and me
We just don't see
The same things
We haven't seen eye to eye
Since we were thigh to thigh
It's easy to overlook things
With the inkling that
Intimacy brings
Skin to skin
Rings
Disjointed thinking
We
Need to step apart
I wish I could see
What inside me brings
You to this state
Don't look me in the eyes
I may not be able bring
Myself to let you be
And I might not be able to be
Honest


Chris McQueeney

today in your city

Windows to the soul


They sleep on the streets
They beg you for something
To eat
Sidewalk surfing their
Life away
They learned long ago
Not to look you in the eye
It's been said that
The eyes are
Are the windows to the soul
And they are soul weary
And people are mean
It is hard to live hand to mouth
It's hard to live day to day
When your world
Is only as big as
As a bridge abutment
Or corner store doorway


Chris McQueeney 

Her power

One Taste


With one taste of her lips
He scaled mountains
And ran valleys
Forged rivers
Rested in vales
When desire became overwhelming
Fled in turn
Ran with the moon
And trudged under the sun
One thing on his mind
Making it back to that place
Where she imprinted upon him
Lips like blades
Cutting him to the quick
Holding him in stasis
Or setting his pace
From place to place
Ever hoping to be freed
Or absolutely consumed by need
Addiction complete
Never to be released


Chris McQueeney 

Trippy

Tried to stay

I arrived with the wind
And left with the moon
I tried to stay
But it was just too soon
Like a shag carpet
On LSD
The leaves moved
With syncronicity
It was just too much
I couldn't stay
Thought I would
Drop a line
As if to say
I dropped by
It was a trip
Have a good day


Chris McQueeney

Snooz fest

Wicked deep


Sleep, she is a fickle mistress
Bating one to his last nerve
Sending hours upon days
Into the bitter recesses
Of the past
Night upon night grinding
Away the hours
Until at last
At last giving one
Release


Chris McQueeney

One of those daze

Laughing at nothing in particular


Echo of insanity
Having landed me
In the ward again
Staring at the wall
As the crazies wander
Up and down the hall
And spin
Talking to there is no one there
Laughing at nothing in particular
Nurses guarding the doors
And then
Oh no they are handing
Out meds again
In this place
Sanity is very thin
And thinning more and more
Making it another day a win
Hoping the sting of another
Day will bring
Me back to me


Chris McQueeney 

lest we forget

A half assed nod


What the fuck is wrong with us
That we
Feel the need
To act like nothing ever happened
Take your fucking head
Out of the sand
It was here
We did it
That kind of shit
Doesn't just go away
There are century deep scars
A half assed nod does not suffice
We need keep our history close
Lest we forget how we got here
While we owe a debt
To those whose backs shoulded
The burden of freedom
We still owe
With our words
And actions
A debt of grief for those
Whom were ground under
The heels of progress


Chris McQueeney

Dreamscape

And went away


I dreamt of you today
I dreamt of you
And you wouldn't go away
I dreamt of a drink today
I drank a drink
I drank a drink then went away
I went away today
But I keep coming back to you
And you destroy me every time
And I retreat
And I heal up
In mind and body
But still you are there
In my dreams
Calling me back to you
I dreamt a dream today
In it I drank a drink and tried to stay
I drank a drink today
I drank a drink
And went away


Chris McQueeney

Signals

Please tell me


Do you see
What i see
The fucking radio
Is talking to me
Hell
I don't know what to do
Is it just me
Or does this happen to you too
I don't know
What is going on
But it has been going on
For far too long
What are they trying to say to me
Messages from the radio
Directing me
I know it sounds wrong
But it has been happening
For far too long
I don't know what the fuck to do
They are talking about me
To me
Do they talk to you too
Just kidding
But really
The radio knows my name
Please tell me
It's not just me
I swear
Because they are telling me
They are talking to you too


Chris McQueeney

The smell of sex and flowers

Oh that lust song


If you only knew
How fucking much
I think of you
Best yet
Maybe it's better that you don't
Unless of course
It's in you too
I see you sitting there
With that face and that hair
I imagine my finger tips
Tracing the lines of your cheek
Tasting your lips
You holding me like you mean it
You holding me
Like you fucking mean it
Melting into my kiss
Breathing with me
The smell of sex and flowers
Heavy enough to bite
Or nip
Feeling the slip slide of your hip
Against mine
I close my eyes and that is what I see
You dancing to that tune with me



Chris McQueeney 

Day one

Same old same old


And we wait
We wait
for the hammer to fall
The other shoe
To drop
We wait
Knowing it is gonna happen
And we wait
Consequences are a bitch
But we know that
In advance
Even knowing
What could happen
No
What will happen
We do it anyway
Because we can't fucking help it
If We could
We would change it
Whatever the fuck it is
We would change it
Walk away from it
Free of that burden
But we wait
Knowing it is gonna happen
Because that is what you do
When doing is all that is left to you


Chris McQueeney 

walk her streets

Portland today



I walked your streets
Saw your true colors
Crack man standing on the corner
Hanging with the brothers
One for twenty
Three for fifty
Hand full of bills
If we want
These are streets though
That have more than just
Rock to their roll
Pick your poison
Just this side of old town
Black tar has its way
Pale skinned junkies
Hands out for coins to pay
Trying to chase the sickness away
In every doorway there are
Drunks that beg for the end
To come today
A lone tweeker down Burnside way
On his knees as if to prey
Picking at his arms and face
And this is a beautiful city
With beautiful places
Beautiful people
Beautiful faces
all I saw today
Was some fucking junkie
But that's ok
There are some weird fucking people
Living in Portland today


Chris McQueeney 

I still want to live

Take from me


Take from me
I have much to give
see with me
I still want to live
Walk with me
There is much to see
Hold my hand in this moment
And stand there just so
Look at me that way
Breach me with talk so sweet
It will be good
When we meet
Till that day I will hold
My future memories tight
Take from me
I have much to give
Take all from me
I have need of you to live


Chris McQueeney 

He flies pale in the night

In light of


He flies pale in the night
With the moon
Stranded weightless
In the sky
With the sun
That ever blazing
Ball of fire
Marking his place in time
In his eye
A little blue dot
Dancing its path in the heavens
Rests
Holding all that ever was
And all we can ever hope to be
If we but try
All of this
And other weighty matters
Transpire
In its confines
As well that may be
It is of small concern
In light of the many
Many galaxies
in his overburdened sight


Chris McQueeney

Drunked Up

Sunshine


Drunked up sunshine
Today
Blazing away at my face
I am a wreckage today
A waste
The shine is in my eyes
Today
And it is breaking me
In all those old ways
There is the scent
Of gin and hypocrisy
In the air
Today
And I want a taste
Sunshine In the air
Today
Leading me to the
Place of beware
Today
Through all my drunked up
Brooding
Past lives devils alive
With teeth
Biting their way into me
To be fair I'd say
They are always with me
Just waiting for release
I'm in the drunked up sun
Today
Needing a drink


Chris McQueeney

today

Spiritually hungry


What do you do
When the shit fairies
eat your lunch
Do you go home
Spiritually hungry
And sit on your couch
To consume
To consume more
More of whatever feels
Yes whatever feels
What do you do
When the shit fairies
Start chewing on your soul
Do you then give up
Do you let go
Or
Hold on tight
Hoping against hope
That this time
Everything will turn out right


Chris McQueeney 

hole

Hole


There is a hole
In my chest
In case you didn't know
There is a god shaped
Hole in my chest
Exposing my soul
Here I am left
With this hole
In my chest
And I don't know how
To let go


Chris McQueeney

God shaped

Hole


There is a hole
In my chest
In case you didn't know
There is a god shaped
Hole in my chest
Exposing my soul
Here I am left
With this hole
In my chest
And I don't know how
To let go


Chris McQueeney 

monday it is

You shaped hole


I have no music
In my soul
Bleak and empty
A hole
I have no music
In my soul
Bleak and empty
Blackened hole
I strain for the sound
But
Its nowhere to be found
All I hear
Is the wind
From the vacancy
That crater shaped
Hole
Has a tone
Only I can know
Solo
Lone
And alone
I have no music
In my soul
That is all you left me
A hole


Chris McQueeney 

bowl full of

Or not


This life seems
Like a bowl full
Of dead ends
We pick one foot up
And put it in front
Of the other
In the hopes that
Somehow
Someway
Some day
Things will get better
In the hopes that
Life will get a little
Easier
Even though
It never has in the past
Well
Maybe
Just Maybe
Things have changed
For the better
We put one foot
In front
Of the other
Only time will tell
If we were deluded
Or not


Chris McQueeney

How do I go

You’d say

Just walk away

How do I go

When I just have to stay

Can’t live like this

Too heavy a price to pay

I have trouble

Just making it through the day

This is the point

Come with me you’d say

Where you hold out your hand

And we walk away

But this is no dream

At least not today

You are no savior

And this is no play

You are no savior

And this is no play

I have to walk away

Just go

I can no longer stay

I wish you could go

There just is no way

Chris McQueeney    6/4/15

Do that dance

Two step

We try that old dance

One more time

Around and around

We twirl

Dip and slide

Aside from one another

As if anew

I always think that

That we can start

All over again

Without all the broken spaces

Clean and pure

So again we try

Even though

Even though

It didn’t work last time

Some may say that

I am a glutton for punishment

Rather

I like to think of myself

A hopeless romantic

Either way you look at it

Both are hopeless

Can’t see that while the dance is on

So

We try that old dance

One more time

One more time

One more time

Chris McQueeney    6/2/15

My life is going exceptionally well! I havn't been doing much writing lately but I hope that geets better....

Little ones

Stay the world’s hand

They play as if the world

Was away over there

Not caring a whit

Or even a bit

About the struggle

We have to face

Every day

Stay that way

Little ones

Don’t let the world

Have its way with you

Stay the world’s hand

Live in wonder and warmth

Carry with you

Always

The you you were today

Chris McQueeney    5/31/15

waz up

The Dragon


Lay with me
You said
In that
Come fuck me voice
Stay with me
You said
As if I
Had any choice
Prey with me
You said
We will make some
White noise
I would do that
You know
Lay my fear filled soul
At your feet
And go
Out to kill the dragon


Chris McQueeney

Flagging the vein

Long time past

It takes the rig

Then gets back up 

Again

Pull the plunger

Feel the vein

Looking for that

Old time rush again

Wipe the blood

Off the skin

Looking for that

Old time rush again

Steal some time

You have already

Crossed that line

Long time past

Drawn in the sand

Wish there were

Some kind of stand

But that is too much

For this back ally mind

Stumble step

One more time

To the corner 

Where you can find

That old time rush again

Just this

One 

More

Time

Chris McQueeney    5/24/2015

That is the obsession of every addict...just one more time. I can get away with it one more time. and like that many ride it all the way to the grave....