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Tuesday, January 6, 2015

At a loss for words

Clarion call

We take all sorts around here
Not one for the usual normally
We like um twisted sideways
The more sideways you are
The more credibility you have
So with this clarion call you need
But to answer before time runs out
We are generous to those that qualify
But hard on those less qualified
You’ll see we need and want you around
You will find your place among us
Finding it a pleasant experience or two
But not to discourage you before you
Take that step with no hope of return
For we are a lifetime fraternity and we deal
Deserters with a very heavy hand

Chris McQueeney    11/22/14

My friend passed away on Sunday. I had not seen him in months. I guess after eight years of sobriety he got tired of fighting the demons, so he drank. He drank for one night; that is all it took, one night. After his night of drinking he layed down in his bed...the next morning his son found him and he wasn't breathing...he officially died on Sunday. In AA they talk a lot about working the steps, and being vigilant about our disease. I know that Rod had found a substitute for drinking in his life, but he wasn't able to keep the simple truth that is readily apparent to someone with an outside perspective, Alcohol for an alcoholic is a death sentence. I don't blame Rod for his death, he was an alcoholic and as such he was not in control where alcohol is concerned. The sad thing is that Alcoholism is something that he will be remembered for, a cautionary example to use with newcomer and seasoned veteran alike. Don't drink or you might just die like Rod did! used like a bed time tale to frighten proper behavior out of the listener. I will however remember Rod for the good that he had in him. When I was back to the drinking and fully in my disease Rod would come over to my home and talk to me...and he was not judgmental of my disease, I think because he had compassion for a drunk, hope to die alcoholic. I am at a loss for words when it comes to my own grief. And I was just a friend, his family must be stricken. We lost a good man sunday, and I am at a loss for words......


kj said...

Chris, I am sorry for your loss and for rod and his family; I am also very glad and relieved to hear the way you view alcohol and all its destruction. That fear has kept me sober for many years and it 's a good fear. So happy you no longer drink, a day at a time

Your last few poems read more like they used to: I like 'em xo


Other Mary said...

I'm so sorry, Chris.